Sunday, 21 September 2008

Don't go to Fratton Kebab House!!!!

Today - we decided to have fish and chips for tea, this was a good option as Claire had some plaice (Which i don't like)in the freezer for her and Darcie and chicken for Harvey. It was only my tea and the chips that were missing - this was the first mistake of the whole tea time tragedy. 

I set off on my merry way down to Fisherman's Wharf in Festing road with my list and £8 in my pocket.  Unfortunately the opening hours had changed to "Not open Sundays!"  - "Ahhh F*ck!" Quote I!   so I turned around and walked to the other chip shop that i know of - this unfortunately is at the other end of Fratton.  After a nice longish walk I get there to the sign of "Not open Sundays!"  Ahhh F*ckty F*ck F*Ck!  This unfortunately isn't the end of my sorry (all be it fairly short tail!)

I contacted the better half and discussed options with her, pizza was too expensive so was indian and Chinese - so i decide to go for the students / drunks favourite - Kebab!  now there are two around here Effes - which I've been to in the past and like - or the one that i was currently standing outside of - The Fratton Kebab House.  Kebabs - kebab right! 

So I order two large portions on chips and a Donor Kebab (salad but no sauce) , and I sit down and start to play with my phone (damn you pinball).  I get awoken from my  trance with the call of "£6.50 Boss!"  Being the trusting soul i am- I hand over the cash, take the (ripped) bag and slouch back to the flat. 

The pile of shite that i had now purchased now became apparent to me - the two larger portions of chips where no larger than half portions, the boxes were only the size of a burger box, plus they were half full, the kids were alright but we had only a handful each! but the kebab was the best bit - i poured the greasy disaster onto my plate to find a Raw, stale and in pieces pitta bread dumped in the bottom of the box (which was now on top of my food) Yummy!  after bitching for a bit i resign myself to eating it or being hungry and tuck in.After a few mouthfuls of dodgy tasting meat i find something in my mouth that i cant eat.  A nice large piece of plastic - yum yum yum!  Now i have to wonder - how much of my Kebab actually came out of the bin. 

This is why i implore you - dont go there!  not if you value your money or possibly your digestive track! 


The Pitta from hell


No comments: