Tuesday, 9 March 2010

Google Chrome Vs AVG Link Scanner

Consider this something of a cautionary tale – told to you by and old sea dog with long grey hair and matching beard, clothes in a yellow slicker, beige woolly jumper and  black / blue jeans…! 

“‘tis a dark and stormy night when the it began..” the ancient force began.
”Google Chrome, my faithful and long standing companion was feeling the forces of the open sea” the descriptive tale continued. “for more years ** than i care to remember we wondered the world wide web seeking out strange and new creatures and discoveries.”
He reaches up and brings his fingers through his thinning grey hair, his eyes settles on a framed picture of the wall – himself holding a new born Firefox browser – so fresh and fast, he remembered how it would race through the fields of facts and seas of links.  Years before it too had begun to feel the weight of the world reduce its speeds and sap its strength.  Sadly old Firefox had to be put to sleep, his successors came and went but nothing was quite as good as that first one. 
His eyes refocused and his tale continued.

“Then one day from the Google labs they released into the wild streams of the internet a new browser – chrome they called it.  nothing had been seen like it before”  he wiped a tear away from his wrinkled eyes and a smile stretched across his face.  “i managed to capture one and it was just like the old days again.”  he sighed “everything worked so fast and so free – until recently that was”
he reached for his hanky and blew his nose - “you see” he said replacing the sodden item back into his pocket. “A few weeks ago i found out old Chromey wasn’t working well, he must be getting old i thought.  but i checked his status and he was up to date – in fact he had recently updated himself.” 
Hs cough a rattled and drew upon his pipe.
”nothing for it i thoughts to my self – i shall have to clean out the kennel and start again, so’s i pulled out my gun and shot him dead in the head, as well as my faithful xp. The tears i wept for the loss of them both”
“luckily i knew how to start again and within a few hours i had to new little snappers going at it like never before” he chuckled to him self “not in that way – you understand”
”Everything was working fine but then i gave both of them an AVG anti virus pill, and suddenly things went wrong again…The speed was gone, they only chugged along.  Steam power would have been faster.”

a spiral of blue / grey smoke issued from the pipe and a red glow filled the bowl - “I figured that maybe AVG had also updated recently and maybe that was causing the problems, i looked into it and disabled the Link Scanner.  And wouldn’t you know it”  he laughed out loud. “They started to work again – and fast too.  this old man couldn’t be happier. well maybe if he could stream video – but thats all really!” with the completion of his tale it was if years had been lifted from his aging skin.

i lean forward and stop the tape and thank him for sharing his story, as i leave the little cottage i look back at the old man and his newly restored chrome.  This is one of those tales – i tell myself – that will give hope, for future generations to come.  i close the door and leave.

** Editors note – well for at least a couple of years

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